


Once Upon a Time

by SapphireMoons



Series: A Moment In Time [1]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, And Messing Them Up, Basically GOM in Various Fairytales, Boys Kissing, Casual Mention of Death and Murder, Dead Disney Princesses, Everyone is Kurokosexual, Falling In Love, Gen, Implied Slavery of Magical Beings, Kuroko Just Wants To Make His Deliveries, Multi, One Shot, Stolen Kisses, Strong Language, revolutions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:07:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24481018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SapphireMoons/pseuds/SapphireMoons
Summary: Kuroko just wants to fulfill his deliveries to his friends. His friends, who are also very much in love with him. Of course, he has his priorities straight. (His friends don't.)Prompt: Fairytale AU
Relationships: Generation of Miracles & Kuroko Tetsuya, Generation of Miracles/Kuroko Tetsuya
Series: A Moment In Time [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1768309
Comments: 7
Kudos: 196





	Once Upon a Time

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warning: Blood and Violence, Casual Mention of Death and Murder, Political Revolutions, Mentions of Suicide, and Lots of Fairy Tale References.

Once upon a time, there was an ordinary young lady who lived with her grandmother, traveling day and night from her parents' home in a very iconic hood.

 _No._ Not the Red Riding Hood.

Unlike that girl who got herself eaten the other day, _this_ girl, in particular, was not a girl at all but a very invisible and hard-to-see young boy.

The hood served as a means for the grandmother to see her precious grandson, invisibility was hard enough on aged eyes as it was and heart attacks were a real concern, thank you v much.

And it did not help that her grandson was so _adorable_ in red.

Sky blue locks that dusted his shoulders when tied into two low pigtails just under his ears, combined with the red cloak over his ~~expressive~~ face — she insisted he wear it every time, as much as _possible_.

Tetsuya, the good child he was raised to be, obliged her.

But now, due to the death of that stupid girl who had an eyesight that was worse than his grandmother — The sheer _nerve_. To copy her perfect, adorable, worthy-of-godly-worship grandchild. As if she could compare. No wonder she didn't have enough brain cells to figure out the wolf was not her grandmother. — everyone thought that he was the wandering ghost of the girl, not knowing that she was dead.

With the circumstances, it was probably true. The girl couldn't even recognize her own grandmother.

However, contrary to the rumors, it was only because Kuroko had low presence.

Therefore, one day, as he laced up worn but hardy boots just below the knee, Kuroko Tetsuya thanked his mother and father before leaving his family home, red cloak blanketed over his shoulders and head, a wrapped basket looped over his arm.

With a sigh, he set off to his journey, past the five kingdoms along the way.

The five kingdoms were peculiar in the invisible boy's opinion.

One was underwater in a vast ocean, another was littered with sleeping persons lying everywhere, one was under a hole at the base of a tree, another was too shiny and lastly, one was overrun with dwarfs.

And in everyone of them, Kuroko had a friend, who was… too troublesome for anyone's good.

* * *

Under a vast ocean called the Red Sea due to the color the waters would turn when the sun would set was the kingdom of Atlantis. Or so, they said.

~~"The blood of the victims." Aomine stage whispered.~~

It was home to mermaids and mermen alike who prospered in the crystalline waters.

Kuroko arrived with no fanfare, since no one acknowledged his existence as the wolves walked past him with disinterest, no more than a passing wind.

Setting down his basket in no particular hurry, the boy untied a hidden canoe before pushing it into the shore, inserting his items before setting out to row across to the land on the other side.

However, before he could even get halfway, a head of crimson locks popped up from the surface, mismatched eyes amused, the long cascade of red flowing in small waves past his back. Dressed in a thin, dark red robe that only teased a muscular collarbone and milky skin, the oceanic prince had a golden pin in his hair just above the ear, symbolizing his status as the merman made his way over to the boat.

With a small flash of venomous spines of a golden fin, it was only when the redhead had appeared beside Kuroko's boat that the boy stopped rowing, facing the merman who watched amusedly, muscular arms over crossed over the side of the canoe.

"Good morning, Tetsuya."

Kuroko met the heterochromic eyes fully, placing the oar in the boat, well aware that the merprince could drown him with as much as a whim. "Good morning, Akashi-ouji-sama."

The redhead frowned. "I told you to drop the formalities with me, Tetsuya. Simply call me by my given name as I do to you. You, of all people, are eligible to speak to me informally."

"It is not proper and disrespectful to you, Akashi-kun. 'Akashi-kun' is the best that I can compromise. You are a prince and I am a commoner." Kuroko replied as Akashi hummed, willing to compromise as they do every morning Kuroko rows across. "Have you been well, Akashi-kun?"

"Relatively." Akashi answered evasively, swimming off to the side of the canoe, his perfect expression pulled to an annoyed glare. "The waters have been disturbed by a homegrown usurper, one that I personally find to be... a _hinderance_."

Kuroko rose an eyebrow. "And you allowed this annoyance to live, Akashi-kun? That is unusual for you." ~~And strangely merciful.~~

The red-headed prince hummed, acknowledging. "The situation did not allow me to take the initiative, Tetsuya. But I assure you that it is short-lived, and by her hands entirely."

"Her?"

Akashi nodded, the golden ornaments in his hair dangling delicately in the damp locks. "My twin sister, Ariel, is a sheltered child because of her resemblance to my mother. However, unlike my mother's elegance and poise, she is naive and _disobedient_ — unknowing of her place despite being a princess. She has fallen in love, so she claims. With a _human_."

"Is he nice?" Tetsuya commented, fiddling with his basket. It was here... _somewhere_.

Akashi would have snorted if he did not have the proper propensity. "He is a prince from one of the smaller kingdoms that she had apparently rescued when he was drowning. Shame he did not perish, but nonetheless, my sister is now _infatuated_ with him."

"Love is blind, Akashi-kun. All, regardless of class and race, are irrational before love." Kuroko said wisely.

"I would understand if she were fascinating and unique as you, Tetsuya, but he is as engaging as decomposing kelp." Akashi hummed as Kuroko blushed but ignored the smirk on the merprince's face.

Kuroko changed the topic back to the to-be dead princess, still looking in his basket. It was rather large, you know. "But you mentioned that this situation was to be taken care of?"

"Ah, yes." Akashi breathed, as if just recalling his words. But it was not possible. Akashi-kun had an impeccable memory. "A week ago, she foolishly entered a contract with the Sea Witch — It is not appropriate to call others names, Akashi-kun. What else would you call Aida Riko-san, Tetsuya? _…Fair enough._ — that made her turn into sea foam if she could not win the heart of that human."

"And she was unsuccessful?" Kuroko was still rummaging through his basket.

The prince nodded, brushing back his hair with a small hum. "Hard to fall in love if you are rotting in the sea. She has a little over a day to 'find' him unaware that I had drowned him the day she signed her tail away. I expect my coronation will be in a few days if it goes smoothly, since Father is so heartbroken. To think all I had to do was kill her pet for my ascension."

"Please do not speak ill of the dead, Akashi-kun." Kuroko sighed.

"It is not ill, Tetsuya." Akashi scolded lightly. "Turning into sea foam with her voluntary consent, it is complimentary if anything. Easy disposal."

Sighing, Kuroko knew arguing was futile as he finally removed a small parcel, wrapped meticulously in red cloth. "Here you are, Akashi-kun. Your tofu soup and requested mochi. Please consume them soon and I hope they are to your liking."

Taking the water-proofed package, the prince smiled an expression reserved for the boy in red alone. "Thank you, Tetsuya. Please send my regards to your family. Will you be joining me to the palace?"

Kuroko shook his head. "I humbly and politely refuse, Akashi-kun. I think my presence is unwarranted as unstable the current events are in Atlantis, as I am a human. I also have other deliveries to attend to."

"But, of course," The merprince sighed, as if he was used to this answer. "Well, then before I send you on your way, Tetsuya, allow me to express my gratitude for your generosity."

Before the invisible boy could react, the merman pulled the ribbon of his cloak down, bringing their lips together in a soft kiss. It was short and sweet, pillowy to the flesh as Kuroko taste the sea and a hint of tenderness that could only be identified as purely the Blood Prince of the Sea.

As swiftly as he pulled him in, the prince was gone with his parcel, and Kuroko's composure with him. (I have always loved _red_ on you, my lovely Tetsuya, ever since _that_ day.)

Cheeks hot, the little red riding hood (that was not the Little Red Riding Hood — _jeez_ , proper nouns and common nouns make a difference) pouted to himself, the boat moving on its own, no doubt by the command of Akashi-kun.

"Akashi-kun is too bold, not allowing me passage until he receives his desires."

* * *

The neighboring kingdom, was in a nutshell, too shiny.

Everything gleamed with riches, even the diseased pigs of the gallows did so with happy smiles as if to announce how prosperous their nation was.

All Kuroko wanted was to make his deliveries and finish reading his book — It was getting good. The main character was slowly transitioning into a vengeful anti-hero who originally had noble cause. — but his friend had other ideas.

Going to the grandest and most expensive home of the nation, Kuroko found himself at a gold embellished stables, chickens clucking behind fenced feeds. There, he met his second friend of the day, a blonde and most sought-out bachelor of the land, Prince Kise.

Dressed in rags with a worn bandanna to hold back dirtied gold hair that flowed down his back, the blonde lit up like an excited puppy at the sight of Kuroko, or rather when he announced his arrival.

" _KUROKOCCHI~!_ I'VE _MISSED_ YOU!"

"Hello, Kise-kun." How he was able to speak through the tight hug… even he did not know. "P-Please let go of me. I cannot breathe."

Releasing the smaller with apologies spilling, the blonde cooed at the sheer adorableness of the invisible boy. "Welcome back to Cinders, Kurokocchi~! Did you just finish visiting Akashicchi? You're later than usual."

Kuroko nodded, placing down his basket to search through. "How are you, Kise-kun? And please do not lie to me. I know when you are lying to me."

"As expected of Kurokocchi." Kise sighed after melting the smile from his face. "It's all because of that servant girl, named after the kingdom — she's messing up everything after that idiotic ball that my mother wanted to hold."

Kise, unlike the sentiments of his parents and many imperial children, had no desire to be considered a member of the royal family — having had his fill of pompous fucks that smiled as they stabbed you mercilessly in the back. So, he threw shit into the long waves of golden silk hair, exchanged his handwoven fabrics for rags and the position as heir to his father's face and employed himself as a servant at the most expensive noble home.

None even knew of his identity due to the policy of masked balls and the fact that Kise did not flaunt his appearance publicly — rumors were existent without the need for a face, along with the fact that there were too many imperial children to remember them all.

"She left a glass shoe after trying to swallow one of my half-brothers or something like that while courting him. Now, he's scouring the land, looking for her."

"How does that pertain to Kise-kun?" Kuroko piped up from his search. Where had he left it?

"That _dumbass_ doesn't even know the difference between a woman and man!" Kise scowled, throughly annoyed as he threw more kernels for the chickens. "Just this week, I've been stopped _four_ times to try on that _stupid_ glass slipper, Kurokocchi! I would have shoved it in that stupid guard's ass if my idiot half-blood brother were not there."

"Please do not curse, Kise-kun. It is uncouth. Please do not seep to Aomine-kun's level of mental degradation." Somewhere in the neighboring kingdoms, a short-haired boy ~~slave driving~~ commanding his dwarfs sneezed spectacularly. "Will you being doing something about it, Kise-kun?"

"Who knows, Kurokocchi?" Kise shrugged, the pail of kernels replaced with a broom.

"Akashi-kun did say that you only had to ask, and he could have it arranged for you to be the heir and overthrow your father." Kuroko commented, as if he did not just say something treasonous. "In a way, all you need to do is dethrone him. Then you wouldn't be asked to wear glass shoes ever again."

"…That's true." Kise hummed, amber eyes vibrant with thoughts.

But before he could continue with it, a well wrapped parcel was presented. Within was seven well-prepared bentos, varying in flavors and with no fish eyes to stare. "In any case, here you are, Kise-kun. Please eat them quickly otherwise they will spoil and my hard work will be wasted."

Immediately teary-eyed, the blonde assaulted the smaller in a hug that threatened death. "THANK YOU _KUROKOCCHI~!_ "

Jabbing him with a well-aimed stab to the ribs, Tetsuya stared without remorse as the prince-turned-servant cringed in pain on the ground, his parcel delicately before him.

"Excuse me, Kise-kun. It was nice to talk to you again but I need to go. I have other deliveries to make." _And a book to read._

"Wait, Kurokocchi!"

Feeling a hand grab his wrist, Kuroko felt himself turn around with a gentle but firm pull, straight into well-muscled arms. With a delicate hand brushing his powder-blue hair back, Kuroko felt a naughty hand tracing at his hip before he stared up at Kise with blank eyes, blinking at how close their faces were.

Kuroko always hated how perfect Kise looked, even in rags and covered in dirt, the prince was always so _disgustingly_ handsome. Amber eyes playful, Kise smirked before his lips pursed, meeting his own in a kiss.

It was different, longing and filled with appreciation, worship and admiration for him — as if he alone was the most important person. Tetsuya tasted sweet apple and rouge wine, an exotic cocktail that was the Golden Prince of Cinders — a blush covering his indifferent expression.

With a genuine laugh, Kise smiled. "You're so _cute_ , Kurokocchi."

And with that, the moment was ruined as Kuroko gave him another jab for his trouble. "I am not cute, Kise-kun."

But to the smaller's ire, he was still blushing.

* * *

Running through a forest was quick breaths, Kuroko was playing the role of a Disney princess in distress very well, if you needed a stoic princess who was actually, a male and with more character in his eyes than those anorexic ladies.

But to every princess to their own coping habits — unlike those princesses, Kuroko was _intentionally_ getting himself lost.

Because to get to Lostland, one must get lost. _Obviously._

Scanning his surroundings, Kuroko was satisfied to find that he did not know where he was.

What a dilemma he would have been in if he did.

It did no good to know where one was when in Lostland — it was here where one must simply go with the _flow_ — accept things as is and merely allow. Having the sudden need to walk at a random direction, Kuroko held back a scream ~~and a surprised expression~~ as he suddenly fell through a rabbit hole, hair and clothing billowing behind him as he fell forward.

Gravity was working. He could attest.

After falling for approximately twenty-eight minutes through miscellaneous objects that invaded his personal space, Kuroko collected himself off the ceiling of a three-doored room — now which one was it again?

 _Ah._

Kuroko thought as he pulled out a small bottle.

Grimacing and hiding his things off to the side before downing it, the phantom coughed softly as he began to shrink, his clothes too large for his new beetle-size form.

Luckily, the Drink Me! Potion was kind in allowing a smaller version of his clothing to preserve his modesty that included his hood. Having unlocked the smallest door before he shrunk himself, he ignored the Eat Me! Cake with a slight morose frown — the food in Lostland only worked in Lostland, making his dreams of towering over Murasakibara-kun a pipe dream.

Walking out to the forest of Lostland, Kuroko was ignored by the major characters of the tale ~~as usual~~ , until he came to enormous toadstools, to which sat a much more gigantic Midorima.

Dressed in an orange shirt and a matching skirt with military pants that were finished with knee-high leather boots, the _adopted_ nephew of the two opposing monarchs of Lostland greeted him with a careful landing.

But Kuroko's attention was zeroed on the very out of place, frilly _Princess-Peach_ -Level apron over the royal's front.

Unlike what most would protest in donning such a feminine article of clothing _***cough***_ _Aomine_ _***cough***_ — the bespectacled nephew of the White and Red Queen appeared almost proud in his clothing.

 _It was his lucky item of the day._ Kuroko concluded. He was often in the company of strange things after all — it took much more to make him gawk, not that was an easy task within itself.

"Kuroko. You're later than usual."

Kuroko nodded his small head, agreeing. "Yes. I apologize for my tardiness, Midorima-kun. I had deliveries to make to Kise-kun and Akashi-kun as well."

"I see." Midorima replied before taking out a small cake that said Eat Me!, barely as big as his fingernail. "How are they? Not that it is any of my concern."

Kuroko ignored the tsundere's nature and thanked him for the cake, taking a small bite — as he grew back to his original size with his clothes intact. "Thank you, Midorima-kun. Akashi-kun is planning a coup while Kise-kun has been mistaken for a woman because of his half-brother, I believe he too has thoughts of overthrowing the current government."

The green-haired boy didn't even flinch. "Akashi did express such intentions early and his offer to Kise was predetermined to be passed by Absolem when he informed me of my lucky item a year ago."

The said lucky item at the time, was a compass, to which the blue caterpillar bequeathed with a vision, who said that Kise, although, as much of an air-headed buffoon he was, he was destined for the throne.

 _How_ was the question as they all had, much to Kise's dismay — suggesting that their tsundere friend was breathing in too much smoke from being around the caterpillar that hallucinogens clearly deluded his mind.

Midorima ignored them.

Deciding his safest route was to nod, Kuroko followed the taller to the room he had exited as a small person ~~well… _smaller_ ,~~ picking up the basket and the rest of his things.

Rummaging through his basket once more, Kuroko asked his friend. "How are you, Midorima-kun? Are you living with Iracebeth-jouou or Mirana-jouou currently?"

Midorima sighed before scowling. _"Neither."_

Kuroko blinked at this.

Last week, the favored nephew of Lostland, who was loved by both the opposing monarchs of the land was going back and forth between the castles, staying with each of his aunts to sooth both sides — in attempt for them to get along because they only did so on his best interests.

Even though the topic of the Jabberwock and the destroyed Oha-Asa Village were a bit… _touchy_ …

"Why?" Kuroko questioned bluntly, shoving aside something in the basket.

" _Alice_ is here." The honorary prince of Lostland hissed.

Alice, like the many other annoying females that appeared to make their lives harder, was a prophesied girl that was supposed to slay the Jabberwock and restore Lostland back to peacetimes. _Supposedly._

But Absolem admitted that the prophecy was a bit… lost (ha.) in translation as the death of Jabberwock would resolve matters regardless of the slayer as the principle of blood for blood was still very much a social norm. Only the detail that it was to be Alice, in particular, was what stuck.

However, much to the dissatisfaction of the White Queen, this Alice was… not the _right_ Alice, while the Red Queen was keen in seeing the girl's head rolling at her feet. If there was anything that was good about the Red Queen, it was that she was predictable — therefore, when she demanded Alice's head, it was kind of _given_.

But at the same time, the Red Queen and the White Queen were no saints — Midorima's accounts were evidence enough.

"And she's ruining _everything_."

Kuroko waited, having found his deliveries, but good things came to those who waited.

So, he went with the flow and waited.

"Because of her, the Vorpal Sword, which was my peace offering to appease Aunt Iracebeth is now in the hands of Aunt Mirana, framing her as the mastermind. Angered, Aunt Iracebeth demanded for Aunt Mirana's head. _Again_. And now, she is readying the Jabberwock as we speak while Aunt Mirana is too prideful to admit that the _wrong_ Alice outsmarted her in stealing the Vorpal Sword, and acknowledged it as her plan all along. Now, she is in the midst of trying to convince the _still wrong_ Alice to kill the Jabberwock." Midorima ranted, turning into a similar color that reminded him of Akashi-kun's hair.

It was like looking at a strawberry.

"There is a simple solution to this, Midorima-kun."

The tsundere stared at him. "I beg your pardon?"

"Please do not beg, Midorima-kun, it is unbecoming of someone of your stature." Kuroko replied, and before the other could retort, he continued, hands busy with something in the basket. "But to elaborate, Midorima-kun's goal is to absolve the feud between the White and Red Queen because he is a kind nephew. ( _Insert protests and blushed face of a tsundere here. He is ignored by a very_ _unimpressed Kuroko._ ) After Alice-san slays the Jabberwock, under the assumption she does so, merely show them that they must get along."

 _"How?"_ Midorima stressed, clearly annoyed at this conversation.

Kuroko gave him a deadpan stare. "Are you an _idiot?"_

A tick mark grew at the green male's face. _"Excuse me?!"_

"Must I remind you how Akashi-kun and I resolved disputes between Kise-kun and Aomine-kun or between you and Murasakibara-kun?" It involved rope, blood and lots of threats that revolved around stabbing. And one magical flower.

~~Shit. Wrong fairytale.~~

For once, the green-haired royal had a thoughtful expression, entertaining the notion that the phantom had suggested — olive eyes narrowed. "Are you suggesting for me to overthrow Lostland?"

The young commoner shrugged. "It appears to be the trend these days. However, I apologize that I must soon take my leave, Midorima-kun. Here is your delivery."

Kuroko pulled out a set of glass bottles — filled with a thick red soup, that consisted of the tsundere's favorite drink — red bean soup. Able to be consumed either cold or hot, Kuroko handed the six bottles over with a small hint of endearment in his stoic expression. "I hope they are to your liking and I am glad to hear that your kingdom is doing well."

"We are in the verge of _war_ , Kuroko."

"… Yes, in any case, I have other deliveries to attend to. Therefore, if you would excuse me…"

But in the likeness of a shy young lady that could not admit to the favor she was given, Midorima gripped the edge of the red hood with a very obvious blush over his cheeks, dusted a dark pink. Amused, Kuroko paused in his steps, turning slowly as he waited.

"Midorima-kun?"

"…T-Thank you." The tsundere managed, scowling in his blush. "F-For the soup, not that I c-care or anything. Be careful when exiting Lostland, not that it's any of my business. It is _just_ compensation for your delivery. T-That's _all!"_

With a ghost of a smile, Kuroko nodded.

Before turning right around to peck Midorima on the lips, on his tip-toes — the tsundere's lips were a bit dry but tender as the green royal tasted of cake and cough medicine, classic ingredients of their foods when the phantom pulled away, sporting a light blush of his own as he walked away.

Filing the image of a blushing Midorima with a cracked lens in his memory, it was adorable every time, for the tsundere to try to make it seem as though they were less than intimate.

* * *

Searching for the kingdom that his best friend lived in was difficult because of one reason: they kept _changing_ the name.

Not that their reasoning behind such actions was unreasonable, however, as their only heirs to the throne, Aomine Daiki and Snow White were _always_ running away, prompting new revolutions every once in a while ~~_week_~~.

And with every revolution, there was a new name.

Aomine Daiki took one look at his father's throne and promptly flipped him the bird and left with only the clothes on his back. Only to realize how _intelligent_ he was in doing so — and by that, Kuroko means _not at all_ , as he found his friend, half-starved in the outskirts of the kingdom.

After wandering for a bit, Kuroko had only walked off to pick some stray apples to feed his friend after refusing the ganguro from eating his deliveries when a proud Aomine greeted him, covered in blood and with a stomach full of porridge after defeating a family of three bears for their home and porridge — the ganguro won after pushing the baby bear off a cliff with the parents on the way down.

Kuroko scolded him with a deadpan that he was iterating the wrong fairy tale but Aomine had already consumed the porridge before declaring that his won property was unsuitable due to the lack of pornography.

Therefore, after much house hunting, Aomine was currently bunking with seven dwarfs under his employment — he dealt with the trading and paperwork that came with the business with the help of Satsuki, meaning she did _all_ the work and used his name because he was a male prince and helped bypass all regulations while the dwarfs supplied the hard labor.

Akashi called it: _business smarts_ that Aomine had found with a stroke of luck in the form of Momoi.

Midorima called it: _the_ _will of Oha-Asa._

Kuroko called it for what it was: _slave labor under coercion._

But the dwarfs appeared content. ~~So, who was he to protest?~~

Bypassing a sign that had been crossed over too many times to have any legible wording, Kuroko patted himself on the back for his skill in directions before making a left, eventually coming to a quaint cottage in the middle of the woods. The red-hooded boy took one step towards the porch only to be tackled to the ground by a green and pink blur.

_"TETSU-KUN~!"_

Kuroko thought he cracked a rib or his spine. He wasn't entirely sure. "H-Hello, Momoi-san. I-I can't _breathe."_

"Satsuki. Tetsu's going to die if you keep doing that." A lazy voice sounded as the pinkette scowled at him.

Aomine was a tall young man with naturally tanned skin, bright sapphire eyes that could cut diamonds as he frowned at Kuroko's crumpled form. Dressed in leather hunting gear, under the straps, was a loose white shirt and military pants, laced boots decimating anything underfoot — even without the sword at his hip, he was intimidating. "Yo, Tetsu."

"Good afternoon, Aomine-kun." Kuroko greeted as Momoi let him up. The childhood friend and part-time huntress was dressed similarly in hunting gear, although lighter in a peat green skirt and loose white shirt with a leather corset. Strapped to her back and over her shoulder was a bow and quiver with pink feathers as a gold pin clipped her peach hair, Momoi smiled up at him as he nodded at them. "Have you both been well?"

"You mean, other than this woman pestering me to take over the kingdom?" Aomine huffed, as they all entered the cottage.

It was neater than usual.

 _"Dai-chan!"_ Momoi growled before smiling back at Kuroko. "We have, Tetsu-kun! Although, ever since what happened last week, Dai-chan and I have been a bit preoccupied."

Kuroko tilted his head to the side. "Last week?"

"My sister is dead. Or will be." Aomine said with nonchalance. _What is it with dying sisters today?_

"…My condolences?" Kuroko replied with a hint of confusion at the indifference of his friends. Momoi waved a hand like the death of a princess was no big deal. Aomine certainly didn't seem that bummed out by it — he looked more annoyed than usual.

"Not yet, Tetsu-kun." Momoi said as she began to explain.

Apparently, Snow White

("Spoiled dumbass who step-bitch was always jealous over for _no reason_ — just because a mirror said _one person_ was prettier than her. Not that Mother would have been any better, who the _ever-loving-fuck_ has the naming sense of ' _Snow White_ '? At least Dad wasn't stupid enough to name me _Berry Blue_ or something equally as _stupid."_

Momoi and Kuroko were hard-pressed to disagree.

It was like naming a child _Apple Red_ because the child resembled the forbidden fruit.)

had taken a leaf from Aomine's book and had ran away ~~again.~~ Only this time, their step-mother had ordered an entrails deluxe from the fairest princess' body.

Ironically, the huntsman that was given the order was none other than Aomine.

But even though Aomine Daiki was a certified a-hole

( _"OI! Satsuki!"_

_"It's true, Dai-chan!"),_

killing his sister was a _bit_ extreme. But a royal order was a royal order.

"…I still do not understand how your sister is to be deceased in this situation, Aomine-kun. She still has a chance of survival."

"See, Tetsu. There's one thing I know about step-bitch after living with her for a week ~~give or take~~ and it's that once she sets her mind into being the prettiest — Fairest, Dai-chan. _Same shit._ — no one can exist to protest otherwise. She has the dungeons filled to the brim just because of it. So, Snow's as dead as a doornail at this point."

"Speaking of her, where is she?"

"Still lost in the woods." Kuroko thought he had heard screaming. _Huh._

"I see." Kuroko nodded calmly. "So, what are you going to do, Aomine-kun?"

The tanned prince shrugged. "My only concern is that because she's going to die and I have to get the throne."

"There seem to be a lot of coups this week." Kuroko noted as Momoi nodded, as expected of her. "How are the dwarfs-san?"

" _Happy._ " Momoi smiled innocently. Kuroko wisely did not inquire further.

"I see." Kuroko echoed, before a thought crossed his mind. "Aomine-kun, why can't you simply inherit the throne and allow Momoi-san to rule? You may abdicate when you become king or even allow Momoi-san to rule as your proxy while you act as a figurehead."

Momoi's expression became thoughtful as Aomine stared at him.

"What does that mean, Tetsu?"

"It means you let Momoi-san rule for you, Aomine-kun." Kuroko saw the ambitious gleam in those magenta eyes. He knew Momoi was a woman who was advocating for power — she was a huntress and not married for a reason other than the fact that Kuroko had politely declined her. ~~And also divinely worshipped his relationships with his friends. But that was _besides_ the point.~~

Not to mention, she was a sweet woman. She deserved some happiness.

" _Wait_. I don't have to do any work?"

"Other than appearances every once in a while and if Momoi-san agrees, then not really, Aomine-kun." 

_I knew there was a reason I fell for you, Tetsu-kun_. Momoi swooned internally.

"No foreign responsibilities or meetings with the old geezers?" Aomine looked almost starry-eyed. "And no one will tell me I can't read porn?"

Kuroko politely opted out of answering that one and internally decided that he had imposed on his friends for long enough, manners were everything after all. "I have your deliveries, Aomine-kun and Momoi-san."

Taking out a heavy set of bentos that were arguably enough to feed an army of people one-by-one, it nearly filled the large dining table for seven — enough for a week's worth for Aomine alone — all with different types of meat. While for Momoi, he handed a set of smaller but more delicately made bentos, balanced with vegetables and sides along with a week's worth of desserts that were of candied fruits and mochi.

"Thank you, Tetsu-kun~!" Momoi hugged him. "I'll make you some chocolate as a thank-you gift."

Tetsuya and Daiki visibly paled.

"T-That will not be necessary, Momoi-san. I am only doing what is required for me. There will be no need for Momoi-san to through such trouble for me."

Momoi pouted but conceded, still hugging him. Until she caught the look on Aomine's face. 

_Hm~ Dai-chan is so amusing sometimes._

Excusing herself with the notion of putting away the food, her penchant for poisoning foods only traveled to direct touch apparently — much to Aomine's gratitude as Kuroko often wrapped the parcels in _very_ durable containments that he swore could survive any natural disaster. Magenta eyes landed on a bowl of apples, the bright red skin reminding her of a mutual friend — Akashi did tell her to use her resources, and poisoning foods could be a _blessing in disguise_.

Internally thankful for Satsuki's tact — unlike his own — Aomine turned back to his phantom, eyes glowing with suggestion. "So, Tetsu, since you're here, you don't you stay for th—"

"I have other deliveries to conduct. Please excuse me, Aomine-kun."

Aomine groaned into his hands. "You only have one left, and it's Murasakibara. He won't even know if you're late or not!"

"But I will know, Aomine-kun." Kuroko frowned lightly. "And it is not good to purposely miss deadlines — I do not qualify as an idiot."

"You implying something?"

" _Ah_. Aomine-kun is brighter than I initially thought."

"Why _you!"_ Aomine scowled, grabbing the phantom in his arms.

Noting their position, the navy prince's lips grew sly as he nipped the smaller's ear, smirking at the silent hitch of Kuroko's breath. Ghosting over the nape of his neck, the tanned prince kissed the tense muscle softly, tasting the sweet aroma of vanilla and something uniquely the sky-blue boy.

"A-Aomine-kun, please release me."

Feeling the smirk on his flushed skin, Kuroko blinked as he was twirled around, back to the wall with a playful Aomine hovering over him, smirking. "You know that you're not allowed to leave until you give me a kiss, Tetsu."

Kuroko kept his mask to his defence, but the light pink tint on his face destroyed any attempt of indifference like the blitzkrieg. Opening his lips to deny, Kuroko was met with full lips instead, the protests dying a quick death in his throat as a tongue danced in his cavern. Cinnamon spiced the lip-lock as the most gentle of touches caressed his jaw, Kuroko was lost in the moment until a sneaky hand looped a finger under his skirt.

To which he bit on the lip that was trying to swallow him. _Hard._

 _"OW! FUCK!_ Tetsu!"

"I am leaving, Aomine-kun."

"Wha- _Wait_! Come on, Tetsu! You know you _lik_ —"

_"Goodbye, Aomine-kun."_

* * *

A person who is rational, normal and most importantly, _sane_ , would think that if Kuroko was walking by in a field of slumbering persons that looked like they were conducting their daily lives had suddenly fallen asleep eternally, they can _clearly_ see him.

But the magics of Kuroko Tetsuya and his red hood were elusive, as even then, he was unnoticeable as he climbed the steps to the capital of Snooze.

Named after the people's tendency to sleep on spontaneous bouts, the sight of a person dropping dead in snores hardly conferred any reaction as much as a blink. Therefore, in a dream-like fantasy, the land was soft and pillowy, nothing was harder than the clouds above and food was always in reach.

It was a common thing to be hungry after a long slumber ~~_coma_~~ to which the people found quickly, rectifying by allowing food in constant reach.

And for this continued consumption and hibernation, the people were also blessed with a high metabolism — which meant that they grew in extreme rates and aged faster, therefore, died just as quickly. However, other than the high mortality rate, there was an outlier in this midst.

The royal family, the bloodline somehow evolved enough to be youthful and age like everyone else and blessed with the benefits of the people of Snooze — therefore, because of their longer than usual lifespan, they ruled.

Of course, the crown prince in this realm was also Kuroko's tallest and most childish friend, Murasakibara.

The purple-haired male was often found sleeping like the rest of his people in his comfy chambers to which Kuroko made a beeline for — carefully opening the silver grand doors to enter the dimly lit room by soft candlelight.

Towering over to skim the high ceiling was towers of sweets and candy from all over the land, the best of the best for the prince. For he loved nothing better than sweets and food in general, however, one must not be fooled by his child-like ambiance.

He was a sleeping dragon that was capable of _murder_ if provoked correctly — such as one particularly idiotic thief with their monkey, Kuroko recalled his name was something with an A, but in any case, Murasakibara had thrown him out the window, and considering his chambers were in the high towers of the castle, the thief didn't live — Akashi-kun was the one who said that his role was not relevant to this fairy tale.

And like the wise persons that the five of them were when Akashi had asked if they were going to inquire further, they shook their heads.

Survival of the fittest was the basic rule of life in any environment. And Kuroko quite enjoyed _living_.

Sniffing out the food in Kuroko's basket like a well-trained bloodhound, the giant prince shifted in his poster bed, with purple mussed hair and a faint trickle of drool on the corner of his lips.

"Kuro-chinnnn~"

"Good evening, Murasakibara-kun." Kuroko greeted with a proper bow, before moving to light the other candles in the room, expertly sidestepping the candies and cakes on the pillowy floor to the canopied bed. "Did you sleep well?"

Rolling over in a mess of velvet blankets, fine silk and feathery pillows of the highest quality, the man child hummed his reply, voice hoarse from misuse.

"Hai~ When did you arrive at Snooze, Kuro-chin~? You're here early~"

"I am on time, Murasakibara-kun. It is dinnertime as we agreed upon."

Kuroko poured warm water into a dish, wetting a small towel before walking over to the giant as he exited the bathroom. Wiping the giant's face with squirms of a small child, the smaller boy was unsympathetic to Murasakibara's whines of protest — _Kuro-chin~_ I don't _wanna_ wake up~ It's so _comfy_ ~ _Why_ do you do this to _me_ ~? — instead promptly handed him a brush and a bottle of sweet but minty mouthwash.

"Please go wash up, Murasakibara-kun. I have already started the water for you."

Knowing that the giant was now fully awake, Kuroko ignored the leftover grumbles and protests as his taller friend shuffled into the luxurious bathroom with pillows and blankets trailing after him, littering the trail one-by-one.

As Murasakibara bathed and dressed himself, Kuroko was tasked with the herculean duty of taking out the last of his deliveries: sweets from other four kingdoms —

ice cream from Atlantis

(As expected of Akashi-kun to be ahead of everyone else),

cream-filled eclairs from Cinders

("Murasakibara-kun likes the plain ones, Kise-kun. Not the glittery ones from last time."

"I waited _FOUR HOURS_ for that for him!"),

petits fours from Lostland

( _"No._ These will _not_ let you grow taller, Kuroko. You know the Eat Me! Cake does not work outside of Lostland."

"Neither does Midorima-kun's empathic skills, _ah_ , on second thought, Midorima-kun…"

 _"KUROKO!"_ )

and apple tarts from _*insert changed kingdom name here*_

("Let me help you wrap them, Tetsu-kun!"

"T-That's alright, Momoi-san. This is my job, not yours, it would be rude for me to put you to work that is my responsibility."

"More like he doesn't want you to kill him and Murasakibara."

_"Dai-chan!"_

"Seventy-three. Kitchens. Satsuki. _SEVENTY-THREE_.").

Each was in large proportions — making a small mountain that was several inches, to Kuroko's ire, taller than him, by the time he was done.

And by then, Murasakibara had emerged from the bath, purple hair tied back in a white ribbon and in comfortable silk pajamas — the people of Snooze did not ever bother changing out into other clothing — they were going to end up sleeping anyway, may as well be comfortable.

"I have your deliveries, Murasakibara-kun. Everyone else sends their regards of their future revolutions."

"Thank you, Kuro-chin~"

Kuroko swears that he sees sparkles in those usually dull amethysts but says nothing as he nods. Walking off to a wall covered in books of the greatest collections, Kuroko pulled out his book before seating himself on his favorite spot.

In the corner, the floor was padded as he was supported by a firm cushion, a thin blanket in arm's reach. In a move that was too comfortable to be practiced, the giant followed obediently, taking several containers of every snack that was delivered before settling himself on the phantom's lap, ready for story time.

Carding one hand through the soft hair, Kuroko's calm and monotone voice echoed in the chambers, interrupted every once in a while with a few crunches and chewing sounds, but otherwise, resonated with his voice.

It was only when Murasakibara was finished with his food and Kuroko had finished up the last of the chapter that the smaller addressed the taller male. "How have you been this week, Murasakibara-kun?"

"Saa~" The purple male hummed. "Nothing really~ other than that troublesome prince who came by… I don't like him."

"You don't like many people, Murasakibara-kun." Kuroko stated, still carding his fingers through the long hair, having set the book aside with a bookmark. "But that is unusual for Murasakibara-kun to remember someone so insignificant."

The giant hummed in agreement.

"He said he was looking for some princess..." He began slowly, eating a flaky apple tart. "To rescue her from her cursed sleep."

"Half of your population is asleep at any given time, Murasakibara-kun."

"That's what I told him~ He didn't listen and tried to find her~"

"What did he do that aggravated you?"

"He fell on my chocolate statue and made out with it."

"Ah."

"I threw him into the castle moat~ to feed my dragons~"

 _So, that was why he had heard suspicious gnawing noises._ Kuroko thought to himself as he nodded.

Glancing at the window, Kuroko saw that the night was well aged, soon to be into the wee hours of morning. Carefully trying to remove himself from under the giant's head, the hooded boy was quickly stopped by a firm yet gentle grab of his wrist. "Where are you going, Kuro-chin?"

"I have to go back home, Murasakibara-kun."

"You don't have to… _Do you…?"_

"Yes, I do."

"Tuck me in first."

"Of course, Murasakibara-kun."

After requesting the taller to go brush his teeth, Kuroko tightened the sheets and fluffed the pillows on the bed before taking a seat beside the bed, marked book by his side. After Murasakibara climbed onto the canopied bed, Kuroko began to read once more — his voice this time lulling the giant into a dozing daze, barely able to keep his eyes open.

It turned out the main character was beginning his revolution, to take over his homeland to reform it anew — freeing it from the old regime. Kuroko glanced at the sleepy Murasakibara. _Unconscious suggestion was more effective on a subject that slept a lot, after all._

Closing the book softly, the smaller male tightened the sheets, pulling the blankets to the giant's mid-section — knowing he got hot in the night. Pausing, Kuroko stared at his tallest friend for a moment with a soft ghost of a smile. _Murasakibara-kun is so much like a young child._

"Kuro-chin is smiling~"

The smile disappeared.

" _Ara_ ~ It's gone."

"You are dreaming, Murasakibara-kun."

"Hm. Kiss, Kuro-chin."

"Hai." With a soft purse of his lips, Kuroko met his lips with sweet ones, inviting and as delectable as the candies it consumed. Irresistibly saccharine, Kuroko felt like he kissed cold pillows of vanilla as the kiss lasted longer than he expected it to as a hot tongue teased his lip.

But with the reminder of what Aomine tried earlier, the hooded boy deterred entrance to his cavern and instead, pulled away with a dazed expression. Judging from the satisfied look of the Violet Prince of Snooze, he was blushing too.

"Good night, Murasakibara-kun."

_"Good night, Dream Kuro-chin~"_

* * *

As Kuroko made his way to his grandmother's house, he sighed tiredly as he greeted her. Because, unlike conventional fairy tales, he was no princess in distress nor a damsel that needed rescuing.

Kuroko Tetsuya wore red because of the blood splatter that stained his favorite white cloak when he was sleeping over his grandmother's once, killing that wolf at point blank with a shotgun when it tried the same shit with his namesake — right in front of his friends.

With the cloak effectively soiled, his grandmother who was more fixated on how pretty he looked in red, ignored and promptly _stomped_ over the wolf corpse and untied the cloak from his shoulders before saying it would be red the next time he wore it.

So, _no_.

He wasn't a princess or notable fairytale girl.

He just had five princes trying to get into his pants when all he wanted to do his deliveries.

Kuroko combed his hair as he stared at his reflection before recalling the kisses throughout the day, fingers brushing up to bruised lips, smiling in the privacy of his room.

Then again, they were not going to be just princes for much longer after his visits.

**Author's Note:**

> In case anyone is confused:
> 
> Kuroko - The Little Red Riding Hood  
> Akashi - The Little Mermaid  
> Kise - Cinderella  
> Midorima - Alice in Wonderland (with a Beauty and the Beast ref.)  
> Aomine and Momoi - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (with a Goldilocks and the Three Bears ref.)  
> Murasakibara - Sleeping Beauty


End file.
